SUBJECT: 5 Life Lessons

by Nancy Robert on July 14, 2010

Stories to make you think about what you do in daily encounters and decisions.  The stories may or may not be ‘true accounts’ but certainly are good points to ponder.

1 – First Important Lesson – Cleaning Lady


During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read

The last one:

“What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?”

Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50’s, but how would I know her name?

I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank.

Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.

“Absolutely, ” said the professor. “In your careers,

You will meet many people.  All are significant. They

Deserve your attention and care, even if all you do

Is smile and say “hello.”

I’ve never forgotten that lesson.. I also learned her

Name was Dorothy.

2. – Second Important Lesson – Pickup in the Rain

One night, at 11:30 p.m.., an older African American

Woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway

Trying to endure a lashing rain storm. Her car had

Broken down and she desperately needed a ride.

Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car.

A young white man stopped to help her, generally

Unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960’s. The man

Took her to safety, helped her get assistance and

Put her into a taxicab.

She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his

Address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a

Knock came on the man’s door. To his surprise, a

Giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A

Special note was attached.  It read:

“Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway

The other night. The rain drenched not only my

Clothes, but also my spirits.  Then you came along.

Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying

Husband’s’ bedside just before he passed away… God

Bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving

Others.”

Sincerely,
Mrs. Nat King Cole


3 – Third Important Lesson – Always remember those
Who serve


In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less,

A 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and

Sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in

Front of him.

“How much is an ice cream sundae?” he asked.

“Fifty cents,” replied the waitress.

The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and

Studied the coins in it.

“Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?” he inquired.

By now more people were waiting for a table and the

Waitress was growing impatient.

“Thirty-five cents,” she brusquely replied.

The little boy again counted his coins.

“I’ll have the plain ice cream,” he said.

The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on

The table and walked away The boy finished the ice

Cream, paid the cashier and left.  When the waitress

Came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the

Table.  There, placed neatly beside the empty dish,

Were two nickels and five pennies.

You see,  he couldn’t  have the sundae, because he had

To have enough left to leave her a tip.

4 – Fourth Important Lesson. – The obstacle in Our Path

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a

Roadway..  Then he hid himself and watched to see if

Anyone would remove the huge rock.  Some of the

King’s’ wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by

And simply walked around it.  Many loudly blamed the

King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did

Anything about getting the stone out of the way.

Then a peasant came along carrying a load of

Vegetables.  Upon approaching the boulder, the

peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the

stone to the side of the road.  After much pushing

and straining, he finally succeeded. After the

peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed

a purse lying in the road where the boulder had

been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note

from the King indicating that the gold was for the

person who removed the boulder from the roadway.  The

peasant learned what many of us never understand!

Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve

our condition.

5 – Fifth Important Lesson – Giving When it Counts

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a

hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who

was suffering from a rare & serious disease.  Her only

chance of recovery appeared to be a blood

transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had

miraculously survived the same disease and had

developed the antibodies needed to combat the

illness..  The doctor explained the situation to her

little brother, and asked the little boy if he would

be willing to give his blood to his sister.

I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a

deep breath and saying, “Yes I’ll do it if it will save

her..”  As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed

next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing

the color returning to her cheek. Then his face

grew pale and his smile faded.

He looked up at the doctor and asked with a

trembling voice, “Will I start to die right away”.

Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the

doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his

sister all of his blood in order to save her.

The Takeaway?

A little Humility goes a long way,

A display of Kindness is rewarding, and

You can never Give too much.

Perhaps your teams can practice some of these with each other.

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The Kindness of Strangers

by Nancy Robert on March 30, 2010

Anyone stepping into the social media world can attest to the rapid development of templates, widgets and a variety of other integration tools that are put within reach of even the least experienced users.  Not only are some of the tools free, those responsible for creating and expertly using these technical wonderments also give of themselves to help strangers who are clearly wandering in the technology wilderness.  In a world where we perceive that ‘Knowledge is Power,’ why do virtual online communities continue to thrive despite the knowledge they freely share?  Researchers Ho Kyoung Shin and Kyung Kyu Kim from Seoul, Korea provide insights that may help you translate virtual community knowledge sharing behaviors to your teams.

Shin and Kim (2010) assert that self-presentation and organizational citizenship behavior are key elements that encourage knowledge sharing in virtual communities.    Self-presentation is a way for people to share their identity with others.  According to the Encarta Dictionary, identity is “the set of characteristics that somebody recognizes as belonging uniquely to himself or herself and constituting his or her individual personality for life.”  In virtual online communities the process of knowledge sharing allows people to establish identities that build personal reputations of expertise and a desire to help others, while gaining recognition from the group.  Through continued interactions the virtual online community develops a shared understanding of each participant’s expertise, which in turn builds the participant’s credibility.  As credibility and online participation increase, trust grows among the virtual community members.  Members are committed to the virtual online community because they share a common purpose and recognize that active participation determines whether the community will survive.

Organizational citizenship behavior (OCB) refers to behaviors that contribute to the well-being of an organization that are not directly or formally rewarded by the organization.  OCB’s are not mandatory behaviors, rather they are self-imposed actions.  You know OCB’s when you see them; these behaviors make others feel good.  Organ and Konovsky (1989) describe OCB as:

Altruism: voluntary actions that help another person with a work-related problem.

Conscientiousness:  going well beyond required levels of attendance, punctuality, housekeeping, conservation of resources and matters of internal maintenance.

Civic virtue: responsible, constructive involvement in the political process of an organization, including expressing opinions, attending meetings, and keeping abreast of issues that involve the organization.

Sportsmanship: tolerating the inevitable inconveniences and impositions of work without complaining.

Courtesy: gestures that help others avoid a problem, such as checking prior committing to an action that will affect them, providing advance notice to people who need such information.

OCB research by Yu and Chu (2007) posits that virtual online community members demonstrate OCB behaviors in the following ways:

-They share knowledge without an expectation of reciprocity of information exchange (Altruism)

- They conscientiously act as a team when sharing knowledge (Conscientiousness and Civic Virtue)

- They tolerate the risk of no return of any benefits (Sportsmanship)

- They give information to help others (Courtesy)

What can program managers take away from this research? Individual and group identities matter so consider what your team and individual team members are projecting to themselves and to the rest of the organization.  To assess the personality of your team and your team members here is a simple exercise you can use:

GAINING EXPERIENCE:Identify one or more virtual online communities that would provide a user experience for your team members.  Selection of the community can be industry, function or interest based.  Ask team members to sign into a virtual community and participate at least two times over the next two weeks.  As they experience the process have them briefly note their feelings and impressions of the online community group.

Assure everyone the following group process is anonymous.

1-Hand out 8 index cards (4-Yellow Cards and 4-Blue Cards) to each team member.  Ask them to put a positive descriptor of the team on two yellow cards, and a positive descriptor of themselves as a team member on the other two yellow cards.  Using the Blue Cards, ask them to do the same listing negative descriptors on each set of blue cards.

2-As the exercise leader, you will have prepared 8 flip chart sheets with the following headers:

-Shared Purpose  – Active Participation  -Shared Expertise  -Altruism  -Conscientiousness  -Civic Virtue  -Sportsmanship  -Courtesy.   Place each flip chart sheet on a wall so that each of the index cards can be sorted into a primary category.

3- So people can remain anonymous, collect all the index cards into two containers-one container for Yellow Cards and one container for Blue Cards.

4-Divide your team members into two groups, give one group the Yellow cards and the other group Blue  cards.  Briefly describe each of the traits listed on the flip charts.  Ask the groups to quickly place the cards on one of the 8 flip charts.

RESULT: Flip Chart pages will contain both positive and negative individual and team traits.

5-Facilitate a discussion to form a consensus on individual and team traits that are perceived by the team members.   Specifically, identify the top three behaviors that are helping the team to ‘gel’ and gain enhanced performance.  Identify the top three behaviors that impede team functioning.  At this junction you have created ‘TEAM AWARENESS.’

6-Now ask the team what it would take to do more of the top three positive individual and team behaviors, or whether they feel passionate about any other positive traits identified by the group.  When you obtain a list of possible traits from the group, ask for their commitment to enact the behaviors with fellow team members, ‘TEAM ACTIONS.’  Follow up with ‘TEAM PROGRESS INDICATORS’ that highlight progress on traits you want to encourage among team members.

7-Traits that you want to discourage should be discussed-avoid elephants in the room syndrome.  Focus on three traits that really cause group havoc and ask for a team commitment to monitor  individual and group behaviors contributing to the situation. Ask team members to ‘BE PATIENT WITH OTHERS’, ‘BE RESPECTFUL BUT HONEST’, and to ‘ASSUME TEAM MEMBERS ARE TRYING TO CORRECT THE NEGATIVE BEHAVIORS’.

8-Try the TEAM ACTION-TEAM PROGRESS process for six months, then evaluate how team traits have/have not changed.  Adjust accordingly.

Successfully translating the research findings to our individual and team behaviors can provide a glimpse of what can take hold in our teams-sharing, caring and success!

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Process Matters

March 10, 2010

When launching new programs or projects we often assume that everyone involved is on board with the plan and processes associated with getting things started. Technically it’s not a bad assumption given the groundwork that is usually done – planning sessions, team meetings, a review of lessons learned from prior launches, launch announcements – the [...]

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